Introduction to misery loves company
This phrase is often used when someone is in a bad situation, but they find misery even more enjoyable when other people share it with them. When misery loves company, one person’s misery becomes much more tolerable and even enjoyable because there’s somebody else around to suffer alongside them.
The misery can be caused by many different things such as loneliness, isolation, or just feeling very low on self-esteem. This article will explore the meaning and causes of misery loves company and provide examples for each!
The definition of misery
Misery is often used to describe one’s mood when one is not feeling pleased.
Miserable – an adjective used to describe something or someone in a state of deep, profound unhappiness or grief. Happiness – the condition or fact of being happy Misery – noun- extreme suffering or discomfort.
- This term can also be used as a verb- meaning “to make miserable” If I were feeling very sick with nausea and vomiting, my mood would definitely be ‘miserable.’ And if I am feeling delighted and just won 100,000 dollars in the lottery, my mood would be ‘happy.’
- Now you may personally define happiness as a state of mind of being content with everything surrounding you. However, for me, happiness is defined as the absence of misery. So if I am feeling good about my life and family and heard some bad news about something that will affect someone I know (or don’t know), then my mood would not be happy because there is still some misery present: whether it’s concern or uneasiness.
The causes of misery
The cause of misery can be many different things. It could be something that happened in the past, something that is happening now, or something that someone thinks might happen in the future.
- For example, someone suffering from depression may feel miserable because they think about how their life has turned out and what they think will happen. They may think about how they’ll never have a healthy and loving relationship with another person and lose everything they care about. Or, whatever happened in their past may still affect them now and create negative thoughts such as “nothing ever goes well for me” or “I’m doomed to fail.”
- In the case of anxiety, people could have a pessimistic view of the world, so everything that happens to them is negative. They may also fear what will happen in the future and catastrophize about things going wrong.
- When someone has an anxiety disorder, they often believe that their thoughts are true. This is called a ‘cognitive distortion.’ For example, if someone tells themselves, “I can’t handle this!” they might feel as though it’s true because they’re thinking “I’ll fail” or “something bad will happen.”
- Cognitive distortions can be unhelpful because it often creates more anxiety when you think something bad might happen. Living with cognitive distortions is like living your life on a rollercoaster – intense feelings of anxiety and intense feelings of calmness.
Misery Loves Company Examples:
An example of this is when a person feels sad because they are not feeling well. I would say that happiness is the absence of misery while sadness is the presence of misery. However, these terms can be subjective and different for everyone. The following are some examples that may help you to see what I mean.
- Another common example that shows how a miserable loving company works would be two students who have failed their exams staying home instead of studying for school. In this case, the two students are both failing their exams, and they now have a reason to be miserable together instead of lonely or isolated from other people.
- The second example would be a married couple going through a divorce where one spouse is trying to stop the divorce but cannot seem to convince their partner that it’s necessary.
- This misery loves company situation occurs when there is only one person in an unhappy marriage. Sometimes these types of marriages can last for years just due to having nobody around who shares similar feelings about getting out into the world again as single individuals without each other.
1. You are responsible for your own happiness
2. Don’t compare yourself to others
3. Take care of your mental health by getting enough sleep, eating well, and exercising regularly
4. Create a support system with friends and family who will listen when you need them most
5. Get out in nature – the outdoors is free therapy that everyone can enjoy!
6. You have the power to change your life
7. Know when to ask for help
8. Meditation can be beneficial with anxiety! Try this 4-minute guided meditation, or check out our blog on meditating with an anxious mind.
9. Surround yourself by people you are comfortable being vulnerable around
10. Remember that problems are temporary, but they’re an opportunity to learn and grow
11. It’s ok to cry
12. Even the most challenging battles bring growth and opportunities for happiness later if you face them head-on rather than avoiding them
13. Your emotions are valid, even if someone doesn’t agree with them
14. Take responsibility for yourself – you can’t control everything that happens to you
15. Don’t let your feelings build up inside of you – it’s important to process them, even if they’re difficult
16. Try not to worry too much about the future
17. You are in complete control of how you react to things (not what happens to you)
18. Do whatever YOU makes feel better
19. Stop thinking “what if” or “I should have…”
20. Your mental health is always YOUR responsibility, no one else’s
21. Spend time doing something nice for yourself once in a while! Even a bubble bath can make a difference 🙂
22. Remember that feelings stay us long after an event has passed
23. You deserve to be happy
24. It’s important to take time out of every day to do something you enjoy for yourself
25. Even if it feels like everyone is against you, remember that there is always someone who loves and cares about you and your well-being
26. Make a list of things that make you feel good, and try your hardest to engage in them regularly – even when it feels difficult! We’ve created a post on self-care tools here.
27. Your mental health matters! Don’t neglect yourself by staying silent or trying to handle it alone (if that’s what makes you comfortable) – talk with someone who cares about you and knows the right things to say, whether it’s a relative, friend, doctor, or counselor
28. Make sure you’re eating enough
29. Speak up! It’s important to have someone who will listen to you and support you when things get tough
30. If something is stressing you out or causing anxiety in your life, it helps to try not thinking about it all the time – make a list of everything that’s bringing down your mood and write them down every night before bed (it’s amazing what we forget about overtime), then check back on it the next day and see which things you were able to eliminate from the list – small steps like this go a long way!
If you’ve ever felt like no one understands what it feels like to be in your position, you are not alone. It can feel as though misery loves company when surrounded by people who seem to have their lives together. The reality is that most of us go through periods where life seems unfair or difficult, and there will always be someone else feeling the same way. You may even find yourself being more grateful for all of the things that don’t bother other people because they remind you how good you really have it!