What Flying Monkeys do for Narcissists

Have you ever heard the term “flying monkeys?” If you’re not familiar with it, don’t worry, you’re not alone. The term is relatively obscure, and most people have never heard of it before. But that doesn’t mean that it isn’t essential. The history of the term flying monkeys is quite exciting and can tell us about narcissistic abuse.

So what exactly are flying monkeys? And what do they have to do with narcissists? Keep reading to find out.

Narcissist’s flying monkeys

Flying Monkey is the term in psychology for an unusual group of people who are often in orbit with narcissists supporting or protecting what they do.

Like the flying monkeys in Wizard of Oz from the Wicked Witch of the West, flying monkeys are brainwashed maniacs that the narcissist employs.

  • The idea may sound idealistic and psychotic, and it may seem difficult to think anyone should stoop down and use someone to do their dirty work. Sometimes you might be surprised.

Versions of reality

There are not many resources available to prepare for narcissistic abuse. This is important because you are not in this narcissistic abuse cycle that’s not necessarily a win.


Narcissists are master manipulators, and they often use flying monkeys to gaslight their victims, spread rumors, or discredit them.

Who They Are

Flying monkeys can be family members, friends, or even co-workers who have been turned against the victim by the narcissist.

How It Happens

Narcissists flying monkeys often don’t realize that they are being used, and they may even believe that they are helping the narcissist when, in reality, they are just enabling the abuse.

As we advance

There is one big obstacle that must be hurdled to heal. If you cannot comprehend all aspects of your abuse experience, it is unlikely you can even overcome any of those obstacles.

Related: The Most Famous Narcissists

Explaining narcissism to others

Learning to explain narcissism can be an extremely challenging skill. Usually, I’d recommend this advice to anyone mentioning Narcissist enablers for a reason: narcissism can convert people into supporters.

It would help if you also had a very carefully explained explanation of the behavior of the flying monkey.

Remain Objective

Narcissistic abuse can be challenging to identify because it often starts as small put-downs or criticisms. Over time, however, the abuse becomes more frequent and severe. If you think you might be in an abusive relationship, reach out for help.

There is no shame in admitting that you need assistance, and there are many resources available to help victims of narcissistic abuse. Remember, YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

How to spot a flying monkey

Flying monkeys are sycophantic hangers that usually circle narcissists whose work supports or defends their activities.

How narcissists recruit

Narcissistic individuals tend to attract flying monkeys by spreading lies and rumors.

This approach is aimed at people interested in other businesses or gravitates naturally to drama, regardless of the credibility of a Narcissist’s claim.

Disarming Flying Monkeys

A flying monkey can give narcissists a new source of energy and motivation. Narcissism and narcissist supply are vital factors in a narcissist’s health.

  • This is validation and support for people in narcissistic relationships.
  • When dealing with flying monkeys, you should always focus on emotional stability.
  • Narcissists can be one of our greatest emotional and self-loathing individuals.

The Gray Rock Method

Deploy against narcissists

The tactic is also applicable to narcissists and flying monkeys and shows them everything about grey rocks.

  • Give simple questions such as ‘Yeah,’ and I feel good. Keep a record of the happenings. The response must be emotional, but never in any extreme.

A better example of the gray rocking technique is to be boring, and the most boring people are the ones who never speak. In other words, if you can get away with saying nothing, do it.

Related: What Is Love Bombing?

Gossip/Smear campaigns

We all tend to gossip, and when you get into trouble, it makes you miserable. Unfortunately, narcissists and their minions continue to use bullying tactics to get attention.

They could quickly launch a smear campaign against you amidst resentment. It’s easy if someone isn’t familiar with this idea that you’ll turn others away.

How To Avoid Smears

Rise above seems a trite phrase and is well-suited. Make a good version of yourself, and don’t be defensive.

When someone asks you about the terrible act that has happened to the ‘narc,’ you’re just wishing him happiness.

The More You Know

The narc abuser cannot tell whether the information a given person has been given is authentic. If people don’t behave as terribly, as they say, they will probably give up and flee. Then they can snap out of the hypnosis and remind them of what you know about yourself.

Narcissists Vs. flying monkeys

Sometimes, a flying monkey is another narcissist trying to take over the position of the first narcissist. If an antisocial person is willing to do so, it could occur. If the two aren’t happy, they’ll leave the narcissist or her flying monkeys.

Unfortunately, narcissistic abuse victims are rarely in a position to see the inner workings of groups of flying monkeys.

Flying monkey apologists

Fly monkeys are generally supported by narcissists and try to manipulate a person into reconciling with the victim. Flying monkeys apologize for their behavior to maintain the narcissistic personality disorder.

In Summary

Flying monkeys are often people who have been manipulated or groomed by narcissists to do their bidding.

These people may not even be aware of what they’re doing and can be easily coerced into helping the narcissist with her smear campaign against the victim. They may also post online to support the narcissist or try to discredit the victim by spreading false information.


It’s important to remember that flying monkeys are just as many victims as anyone else in a relationship with a narcissist–they’ve just been brainwashed into thinking that what they’re doing is right. If you know someone being used as a flying monkey by a narcissist, please reach out to them and offer your support.


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